Death With Dignity...
by DEBBIE JOSLIN
In 1999 my son was given a prenatal diagnosis of "fetal
anomalies incompatible with life". I was offered
"choices".
Ronald Reagan said, "
I know that when the true issue of infanticide is
placed before the American people, with all the facts
openly aired, we will have no trouble deciding that
a mentally or physically handicapped baby has the
same intrinsic worth and right to life as the rest
of us."
In 1999 my son was given a prenatal diagnosis of "fetal
anomalies incompatible with life". I was offered
"choices". I could've flown toWichita,Kansasand
had Isaiah's life taken by inducing labor. The literature
assured me I would deliver a dead infant.He would've
been given a fatal shot so he wouldn't have to "endure
the painful birthing process". How thoughtful!
They'd even sell me a "miscarriage certificate".
I was given another "choice. We could arrange
to give birth and not offer intervention. No, I didn't
like that either. Our choice rested in trusting God.
If the child's condition was truly "incompatible
with life", God would take care of when, where,
and how he would die. Let God be God, the doctors
could doctor and I'd be a momma.
There's only One who can
judge the quality of a man's life, short or long.
Isaiah had "quality of life". Isaiah had
two parents who loved him and showered him with kisses
and holding. He had a big brother and two sisters
who loved to hold him. His hospital visitors were
so many the nurses scolded us. Once home from his
twelve-day hospital stay, his nursery was set up in
the living room near a sunny window. There he could
feel the warmth of the sun and see his visitors as
they came to admire him and bring presents and pray
for him. He was born the day after Mother's Day.
His 32-day life meant he never knew what it was to
be cold or experience winter. He liked to suck on
his binky. Some babies don't, but momma's little Binky
Boy did. He was only able to suck from a bottle maybe
twice but oh, how he loved it! He sat in an infant
swing a few times next to the teddy bear his sissy
gave him. Being held was his favorite thing, especially
by momma. A couple of his visitors said they saw him
smile. I didn't, but I knew he felt happiness and
contentment. The oxygen saturation monitor allowed
us to "see" how love can strengthen a failing
heart. While being held, his oxygen saturation would
rise to 100 percent for a few moments as though there
were no hole in his heart.
On his last full day, the
oxygen saturation sank until at evening it hovered
at 65%. His big sissy, just turned five, asked to
hold him one more time. Emily held him close and kissed
him and told him things five year olds tell babies.
Isaiah liked that! His oxygen saturation SHOT back
up to 100 and stayed there for several minutes. Later
his daddy (some little boys don't have one you know)
kneeled down to whisper sweet daddy things to his
little boy and gently stroked his forehead. Oh, Isaiah
liked that too! He loved his daddy. His oxygen saturation
SHOT to the top once more and the LED lights of the
machine glowed 100. We announced Isaiah was dying
and might not be with us past the night. Everyone
cried and kissed the baby and told him good-bye. Some
people don't have anyone to kiss them good-bye, but
Isaiah did.
He made it through the night and was given another
round of kisses and tears and good-byes the next morning
by his adoring siblings. The babysitter arrived and
scooted the children off so mommy and daddy could
be alone with their son for the last time.
Isaiah died that morning
with dignity. Dignity means no one killed him and
he wasn't alone. His momma's arms were around him
through the whole process. Some babies don't die with
dignity. About fifty million babies have died legally
without dignity since January 22, 1973.
When will it stop?
The support, information and encouragement provided by the PPFL parents is not meant to take the place of medical advice by a medical professional. Any specific questions about care should be directed to a health care professional familiar with the situation.
